Business Jargon Protest Mugs Copy Contest

Short lines to protest the ridiculous jargon and cliches that permeate business language...

In Issue 91 of the Excess Voice Newsletter I asked everyone to come up with copy ideas for my Business Jargon Protest Mugs. The response was huge. Thank you!

The winner? Marli Murphy who came up with six great lines. And Dianne Calnins came in a close second. Great lines!

Next step? Well, it’s never too late to start shopping for Xmas gifts for your colleagues and friends.

Choose your Christmas Business Jargon Protest Gift here...

And do YOU have a great business jargon line that would fit on a mug? If so, please email me. If I like it, I'll add it to this page.

If I REALLY like it, I'll put it on a mug.


Your lines so far...

From Marli Murphy:

Shift my paradigm before I’ve had my morning coffee and I’ll core your competencies. (See this line on a mug.)

Sorry I’m late, but my paradigm shifted over my integrated solution and I couldn’t gain traction. (See this line on a mug.)

My seamless end-to-end solution is better than your seamless end-to-end solution.

Here’s your seamless end-to-end solution. You want fries with that?

You can take your bleeping paradigm to the next level and drop-kick it from 30,000 feet, pal.

Those deliverables you’re bringing to the table better include donuts.


From Kate Rein:

If you want me to think outside of the box, why am I still sitting in this cubicle? (See this line on a mug.)


From Donald Carson:

Finally, a concave interface for all my mission-critical caffeinated initiatives. (See this line on a mug.)

I'm implementing a synergistic beverage action plan.


From Simon Young:

We appear to have begun an upstream shift while simultaneously experiencing a paddle deficiency (See this line on a mug.)


From Bonnie Taher:

What part of “We will instantiate a user-centric market space” don’t you understand? (See this line on a mug.)


From Dianne Kalnins:

Our alliance stands alone in demonstrating the extensivity of integrated partnerships with other collaboratives. (See this line on a mug.)

Love me...love my purpose-driven awareness of non-essential multiplatforms and their threat to all humanity as we know it!

The transparency of the current situation has sparked fear and loathing of my collegiality.

My critical mass is in direct proportion to the number of doughnuts in the break room.

From Charlie Bass:

If we’re on the same page, which part are you reading?


From Sarah Thomas:

Help! My ducks keep running all over the place....


From Michele Lewis:

Concocting unlikely new ways to solve problems that don’t actually exist


From Michael Katz:

Leading Providers of Nothing in Particular


From Scott Mowery:

My only action item at this moment is getting some caffeine!


From Mary Hughes:

If you still say 'Think Outside the Box' you don't.


From Mike O'Sullivan:

Let's talk about online action items offline.


From Rachel Radway:

If we all align with the integrated plan, we can raise mindshare, improve time-to-market and increase ROI.


From Judith Brown:

CRAP: Consolidated Requests for Asinine Paradigms

Sure, we're diverse: we have idiots in all colors, sizes and backgrounds


From Fran Sammis:

We need consensus on the agenda ASAP — and I'm talking COB — or we're DOA. Got that?


From Rick Brown:

Let me check my calendar. No, Monday won't work. How about never? Is never good for you?

Buy a Business Jargon Protest Mug for yourself or a colleague...

 

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